Battle of mind

When the confidence was acted out, one single mistake could just destroy all the efforts I've put in.......

I have no idea what happened but when the doc asked me "what makes up the first and second heart sound?" Suddenly my mind just went blank and there's no thinking process happening...:( Ans. S1= mitral and tricuspid valve closer. S2= aortic and pulmonary valve closer.

What does huge v wave indicate? the doc asked me. BLANK and could not think!!!
Ans. systolic refill thus tricuspid regurgitation!!!

Ever since the first wrong answer, esp the VERY obvious one, it's like a voice in my mind telling me, "How could you possibily miss this kind of ease but IMPORTANT answer? Are you useless? How can you possibily fail this?? How are you going to get good mark with this kind of knowledge?" The barely existent confidence is now totally destroyed. Struggled and struggled, just tried to gather the rest of the mind back....but as this kind of "blank out" happened again and again, it seems that I'm giving up on myself at that moment.

God, please help me and give me the thoughts and determination so that I can stand firm and use any failure as a stepping stone to grow.

Lord, I really feel very very frustrated after so many hours of study. Please give me the strength to carry on and be still in the storm. Help me win this battle of mind and curve Your words into my heart.

I am Your creation and this is the gift and task You have given me. You will ALWAYS ALWAYS provide enough talents and ability to handle these. Your grace is more than enough for me.

Lord, Your are ALWAYS with me and please help me so that I can be a competent doctor who is able to serve Your people, for Your purpose.

In Jesus' Name, Amen